Why do I run away?
Why do I go astray?
Why do I ignore this day?
Why do I run away?

I need you, Jesus, to run after me.
Take this heart of mine, set me free.

I pray that You hear me when I call.
Come and take down these walls.
I want my life to be Yours,
Only Yours.

No one can take me away from You.
No one can touch my heart the way You do.

Why do I run away, instead of running to You?
Why do I go astray, instead of seeking Your face?
Why do I ignore this day, instead of living my life?
Why do I run away from you?

I need You, Jesus, to take hold of me.
Take this heart of mine, live through me.

I pray that You hear me when I call.
Come and take down these walls.
I want my life to be Yours,
Only Yours.

Written in the journal from the Prayer Room during 40.

I have so many dreams,
It wears me out.
I want to save the world,
But I don’t know how.

My dreams become chaos in my mind.
I search for ways
to make it clear
and to find
peace.

Peace… knowing you saved the world.
That was Your call
Show me mine.
My dreams are so many,
I’m losing time.

I’m so scared
I’ll give up
if I face opposition
Accomplish Your dreams
through me.

Oh God!
I’ll do anything.
Give You everything.

Written in the journal from the Prayer Room during 40.

I will never understand why You are so great. We deserve nothing. We deserve death - we deserve more than death. But You love us anyway. Thank you so much!

Jesus, I want to be madly in love with You. I want my heart to be so close to Yours that I can tell when You are going to move. You are so great and awesome. Please remove and heal my wounds so that I can live freely for You forever and always. Help me to seek Your face and be a young woman after Your heart and Your will. You are truly a great God.

Amen

Written in the journal from the Prayer Room during 40.

You are so beautiful.
I love You so much, Adonai.
You’re absolutely amazing.
There is no one like You, not even close.
Your eyes see.
Your ears hear.
Your lips kiss.
Your breath gives life.
Your mouth speaks and sings.

You’re the best!

Written in the journal from the Prayer Room during 40.

Holy Fire, consume me.

Lord, it is my prayer that your holy fire to come down on this church and ministry. That your power would spread from student to student in an unstoppable consuming fire. That they could ignite their friends with as little as a single touch. How amazing is Your love and power, and what a privilege it is to sit at Your feet. How badly I want to share You and the love and stability You have provided me.

God, I pray that my eyes will see things that only glorify You and hear things that are sweet to Your ears. That You would place a torch in my hands to carry everywhere. That the first things my friends and families notice is this torch; I pray that its gleaming light intrigues them. That they become interested and ask questions about this light. I want Your words to flow through me, spoken through my lips.

Help me to save those I love from the grip the enemy has on them. Help me to show them how wonderful having You in Your heart is. How I’m able to discern right from wrong and see miracles happen through your name. Anoint my feet so that I may only walk into places that please you. For those places where Satan dwells, give me the power to take over that territory and bless it in Your name. Please help me to never forget all the times that You revealed Yourself in an undeniable way.

May I serve You all of my days.

Amen.

Written in the journal from the Prayer Room during 40.

Lord, You go before us and continue after us. Lord, thank you for showing me that You will never call us to somewhere you are not. You do not send us out without Your provision. Lord, You are in motion; You are already working and stirring. You are already dancing. Then, You invite us to join in, to do a mighty work where You have laid the groundwork. Lord, this is a daily thing - You dance daily; You constantly reach Your arms out; You allow Your bride to dance and work along with You.

Lord, we come to You at times as whores and prostitutes, and You still choose to dance. You don’t hold us in shame. Sadly, that is usually when we are ashamed of You. The thought of dancing with our Savior, our one true lover, is unbearable. This is usually when we come to You complaining, needy and a mess. We don’t even notice Your extended arms. We are just looking to see what is in Your hand that You can give to us. By this time, we once again are the work that needs to be taken care of.

So spotless lover, You choose to get down on Your hands and knees and find us in our hiding spots. You pull us back to the rhythm of Your love song and start with the simple steps all over again. We again are spotless, and You bear our ugliness. You wear our stains. O Lord, we aren’t worthy of Your gracious ways. You ask us to love You and love others. We daily fail, Lord. Grant us all wisdom to see when we are the ones who need work. Pull us out in Your loving, fatherly way. We want to dance in Your glory with You. Lord, we want to be Your field hands to do Your work. Lord, we want to dance in the dance that the angels and the mighty saints partake in.

May it be so.

Lord, You saved me for a reason. This life is not mine. My life is not mine. May I not seek things to do for you, but seek You to do things through me. May I be a vessel used for your glory. Lord, I ask and desire to do great things through and for You. May I be content with Your will for me. Help me to look at each day as a chance to honor you. Might I wake up and ask why you saved me that day and for what purpose I am Your elect.

Lord, I struggle with consistency in thought. I go hours with giving you no thought while you never stop thinking about me or caring for me. I love Your grace and Your love. Help me to fear You. May I understand how to fear You.

Written in the journal from the Prayer Room during 40.

Abba,
I need to find my worth and satisfaction only in You. I need to live to please and impress only You. God, I truly want my heart to beat in time with Your heart. I want to be in tune with Your Spirit, to discern His whisperings in my life. I want to bear His fruit - may I be patient and kind and faithful. Pour Your love and joy on me so that I can give it back out. Show me the difference between the Truth and that which is skewed by my emotions. Keep refining me, no matter how much it hurts.
I want my joy to be defined by You. Not any earthly person or thing. I claim freedom from this in You. Give me Your strength to carry it through.

Father, I’m sick of living vicariously through others. You say, “blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished” (Luke 1:45). Abba, Father, forgive my disbelief! I want to live with confidence that I have no seen or heard or conceived what you will do through Your servant. Open my eyes to You. Teach me to expect greatness from You. Your love cannot fail me.

Written in the journal from the Prayer Room during 40.

God,
Thanks for Your mercy. Thanks for reminding me of Psalm 103.
You forgive all my sins.
You heal all my diseases.
You redeem me from death.
You crown me with love and tender mercies.
You fill my life with good things.
You give me righteousness and justice.
You are compassionate. Merciful. Slow to anger. Abounding in love.
You do not constantly accuse us.
You do not remain angry forever.
You do not punish us for all of our sins.
You have removed our sins as far as the east is from the west.
You are tender and compassionate.
You know how weak we are.
Your love remains forever.
Your salvation extends to our children’s children.

God, why do I doubt your goodness? Why do I get impatient or turn away from You when I am frustrated? Keep my heart whole before You. I feel so overwhelmed by life, by thoughts racing through my head, by expectations I have put onto myself and by expectations I feel that others have of me. I am exhausted. Renew me. Be the center of my life. Help me to trust you.