Have you ever thought, “Wow everything is perfect. My life is going exactly how it should be. I love my family, I love my friends, I love God, I love everything!” That’s precisely how I felt last summer. In my book, it was the best summer ever. I couldn’t believe how much God had blessed me.

But then He took it away from me. Why? Why on earth would God take my (so-called) perfect life and take away what was most dear to me at the time? I don’t understand it. Was God not happy with the life I was living? I thought I was going down the right path. The problem begins there, because I can think what I’m doing is moral and pleasing to God. “People may be pure in their own eyes, but the LORD examines their motives.” (Proverbs 16:2) God saw through what I was doing, even when I fully couldn’t see what I was doing.

It’s funny- when I entered a relationship with this guy last summer, I had every intention of making Christ its foundation. I did at the beginning of the relationship, but at some point I started losing sight on what God had in mind. Slowly I was trading in my intimate, personal, burning passionate relationship with God for another relationship that could never satisfy. I exchanged unfailing unconditional love for a love that ultimately failed because it wasn’t love from God. Gradually this relationship was put on a pedestal, and I began to worship it by giving it all of my time and letting it consume my every thought. It became my idol.

God, being rightfully jealous, took this relationship away from me. At first I was devastated. What do I do with my time now? I was spending time with this guy every second I could and then he was gone. So the pedestal became vacant, but it caused me to look down and realize who I had forgotten and left behind- God. And He is the one who deserves all my attention, all my love, all my praise, and all the glory. He comes first. I gave Him nothing even close to that. But isn’t it wonderful to know that even though our God is a jealous God who can take away everything, He is also a merciful God who says, “O repentant sinner come to me. I will make you as white as snow and I will supply you with all you need. From now on your heart beats for me.” My prayer is that your heart would only beat for God.

Lenses help people see clearly, and for anyone that has major eyesight problems like me, you can’t see without wearing them. I have a pair of lenses, a pair of actual physical glasses, but I also have another pair. I got them when I became a follower of Christ. The love that Christ poured out for me shows me how to see this messed up world and the people that live in it because He died for a screw-up like me.

I love the way Jesus sees people. It’s unlike any other. He sees through people’s pasts, flaws, and failures and simply loves them regardless of what they do. Jesus’ lenses are crystal clear. He looks past the imperfections and focuses only on the people themselves and what He can offer them. It’s selfless, unconditional, no strings-attached love.

I think the hardest thing about being a Christian is living the selfless life we are daily called to live out like Christ did- it’s fighting the natural sinful nature. This sinful nature wants us to see without Christ’s help, or Christ’s eyes. It wants us to fix our eyes on the imperfections of others, even if they’re merely hairline fractures. When we pay attention to flaws and flaws alone, it becomes difficult to love others- actually it becomes impossible. And when we are incapable of loving we are providing perfect soil for contempt and pride. This is what happened with the Pharisees and that’s how their pride cultivated into such a monster. I’m at one of those points in my life right now, where I’ve been letting pride grow way too easily, and I don’t want to be a Pharisee.

Praise God! He is so good at humbling pharisaical people like me when He says stuff like this….
“So when you, a mere man, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God’s judgment? Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness leads you toward repentance?” Romans 2: 3-5

Ouch. That burns, doesn’t it? The first time I heard this section of Romans it was like God was literally burning a hole in me as I felt my pride disintegrate into a pile of ashes. The hole didn’t stay there long though, because I asked God to fill the hole where my pride was with His Grace and Love. There is no way we can truly love others without the Love of Christ in us. His Love is how we see and treat others.

See with the eyes of Christ, not your own.

Since I was raised a Christian my whole life, I really don’t have any clue what it’s like living life without God. There were periods in my life when we got distant, or rather I got distant from Him, but He was still always there and I could feel His presence. When you’re a Christian for so long, there are just some things that you do. You do them for so long, you aren’t exactly sure why you do them anymore. Then I started wondering….

Why do I follow God’s law? This was a question that was always in the back of my mind when I was in junior high and three years into high school. To be honest, saying it was in the back of my mind is an understatement- it was constantly on my mind.

Other than going to college this year (MCC represent), I have always gone to a Christian school, a Jesus-freak school- call it whatever you want. There the law was pounded into my head. Do this, don’t do that, don’t EVER do that. It all seemed like a bunch of rules, and all this pounding was giving me a headache.

So I started running away from God, because I didn’t want to have to deal with all the rules. I felt like these rules were not just a fence, but a giant concrete wall, prohibiting me from living the life I was supposed to live. I wanted to climb out as fast as I could.

God loved us so much, He gave us free will. Free will meaning that if we want to leave Him, He’s not going to force us to stay. God will speak to us, and tell us not to go (my conscience!!), but in the end, it’s all up to us. This freedom blows my mind- that’s love.

Thinking about it, it was like there was never even a wall there that I had to climb. So why did I feel so restricted and held back? ….All those rules that I HAD to follow.

I’m so stupid. It was never about the rules. It was God’s grace that made me free.

Romans 5:8 But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.

Ephesians 2:8 God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God.

Romans 8:11 And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you.

2 Corinthians 3:17 For the Lord is the Spirit, and wherever the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.

I failed God so badly. I even tried running from Him. No matter what I did to Him, He still loved me. He loved me so much that He died for me.

Change. I know there are a lot of people that say change is good. It keeps life from being boring; it’s stimulating. I used to think that I liked change too, but that’s because the changes that were going on in my life were changes that I wanted.

But what about the changes that you don’t want? I don’t think anybody likes it, especially when it comes without warning. The worst thing is we don’t always have control over it. It just happens. We can have the most amazing time of our lives, and suddenly with a crash it ends. It paralyzes us so much that we get stuck into believing that things are always going to be this way- that life is forever going in a downward motion. There are no more ups in my life from this point on, I am only going down. Who would trick themselves into thinking this?

Me.

That’s failure on my part though, because I’m forgetting to remember who is in control of my life, and that is God. I may think that I have control in my life, but I never completely do. God ALWAYS does. Why do I constantly fail to acknowledge this? Truth be told, it’s not so much that I forget He’s in control, rather, I don’t trust in what He’s doing. It’s ludicrous isn’t it? God always takes care of His people.

I am a modern day Israelite, wandering the desert and arguing with God that we should have stayed in Egypt. I want to go back to the old life, but God tells me there is a promise land up ahead. Still, I groan and complain due to my lack of faith in Him. Look where it got the Israelites- they ended up wandering the desert for forty years. Eventually they got to the promised land, but their lack of faith delayed glorious God’s plan.

I do not want be an Israelite anymore. I want to have confidence in my God and where He’s taking me. My promise land is coming, and I shall arrive as soon as I stop complaining.

For those of you who are followers of Christ, what is one word that best describes your relationship with Jesus Christ?

This is rhetorical (unless you’d like to answer- you’re more than welcome), but here’s my point. If someone would have asked me this question years ago, I wouldn’t have been able to give an answer. I’ve been a Christian my entire life, but I had never truly taken the time to know Him. I’d read the Bible on occasion, meaning once every month or two, or less. God appeared to me more like a vending machine. I’d only come to him when I needed something, so prayer wasn’t an active part of my life. I’d grab my skittles and go. I went to church too, but I never had my heart into it. I never understood the people that did. It wasn’t that I didn’t think it was possible to have your heart into it. I just couldn’t figure out how the people around me were into it and I wasn’t. Was there something wrong with me?

There was something terribly wrong with me, but at the time I couldn’t’ see it. My problem was that I wanted all the benefits God had to offer without offering Him anything. I’m not trying to be misleading. Faith alone saves us, not works, but you know what a faith in Christ is without works…..

Shallow.

Kiddie pools are fun to splash around in, but there’s not a lot of depth to it. It gets old and boring quickly. There’s nothing to explore since we’ve seen everything.

Doesn’t this describe the majority of today’s Christians? We’re sitting in kiddie pools because they’re too shallow to swim in. We’re bored out of our minds. No wonder we are bored- God is so much deeper than that! There is an ocean of God waiting to be discovered. We are restricting ourselves from seeing so much more of Him. How could we let this happen?

So many of us want all the benefits God has to offer without offering Him anything. If you want a real, authentic, genuine relationship, you’re going to have to give everything to Him. It’s not easy. When you give everything to God, that’s exactly what it is: You bring Him all your struggles and failures, give him all your gifts, talents, and time, and you give Him permission to fill your heart and your mind and say “O.K. God, you may do whatever You want with my life.” That’s a big commitment. I think so many of us became Christians without fully grasping this concept, especially because a lot of us were born into Christian families.

I hope this commitment doesn’t scare people away from Christianity. It shouldn’t -when you give everything to God, you are in very, very, very good hands.

Romans 6:23
“The payment for sin is death. But God gives us the free gift of life forever in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Psalm 121: 1-8
“I lift up my eyes to the hills—where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip— he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.The LORD watches over you—the LORD is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The LORD will keep you from all harm—he will watch over your life; the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

Last summer, I made the decision to deflate the kiddie pool. I was really tired of it, so I dove into the unknown and vast mystery that God is. I began to read His Word every day, and prayer became a regular part of my life. Today, I no longer come to Him just when I need something. I come to Him in times of joy and sorrow. Now I actually want to talk to Him for the sole purpose of building my relationship with Him. Church is something I anticipate and look forward to. I see the whole world with a new perspective, with new eyes. Everyday is an adventure. God is so much more interesting, never boring, always teaching me something new.

Romans 12:2
“Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

If you feel like you’re sitting in inches of water instead of swimming in infinite feet of ocean, submerse yourself into God and let Him take control, the deeper the better.