This past weekend Angela and I went to the west side of the state to watch her dad compete in a national drag-racing competition. It was my first experience at an event like this, but boy, was it memorable.

We drove in at 8:15 AM on Saturday morning. We parked the truck next to my father-in-law’s hot rod trailer. To my astonishment there must have been over 500 trailer-bed/mobile homes/campers set up in lines that literally stretched over a half-mile. When I wanted to use the bathroom facility, I had to walk or jog about six-tenths of a mile just to get there.

Anyway, if you’ve never been to an event like this, here’s how it works: There are like 10 divisions going on and each division gets called up one at a time. There are only 2 tracks that are in use, so you can do the math: Over 500 cars, each doing a time-trial before the actual racing event takes quite a bit of time. Nonetheless, I enjoyed the 2 days I spent there.

For Angela and I, the main event was obviously watching her dad race. His car did the ¼-mile in times ranging from 8.094 to 8.113 seconds (That’s over 160 mph at it’s fastest). In 2 days we spent approximately 24 hours at the track and we saw him race 3 times. That’s not a misprint. The math of it all actually works out pretty easily if you estimate: He raced for a grand total of 24 seconds and we were there for 24 hours. That means for every hour we were there, we got to watch him race for 1 second.

So, in the spare time, we did an assortment of things. We played Cornhole, we ate food, we read magazines, and we watched other cars race. After sitting around for close to 7 hours on the first day I figured God probably had some kind of lesson for me to learn from the experience. I took away 2 big lessons from this weekend:

#1) I learned the importance of PATIENCE. It’s something I lack for the most part, but this weekend gave me plenty of practice at being patient. “Love is Patient” is the first part of the verses (1 Cor 13:4-13) that we hear so often at weddings. Being patient goes hand-in-hand with love. It’s the first way love is described in that famous passage.

#2) I need to be comfortable with who I am. The people I saw were definitely unique. The whole racing environment was a culture I wasn’t used to seeing: There were plenty of tattoos, an assortment of mullets, a plethora of people with missing teeth, an inordinate amount of bandannas, quite a few Confederate flags (at least more than I’m used to seeing around here), and an awful lot of smoking. I’m not used to seeing those things in the environment that I usually am in. However, I also saw a ton of hospitality, kind-hearted smiles, helpful neighbors, endless laughing, and families enjoying the event together.

Through it all, I noticed how comfortable people seemed to be with who they were. They didn’t seem to be putting on a show for anyone. The people were there to have a good time, watch some racing, get a few thrills, and then go home. They seemed unconcerned about their appearance, their clothes, or their actions. All-in-all it was encouraging to observe a crowd of people who were comfortable being themselves.

Too often in my own life and maybe in the lives of the kids I teach, I see an underlying issue of insecurity. A desire to fit in. A fear of doing, or saying, or looking the wrong way. And it’s too bad, because I’m pretty sure life isn’t meant to be lived that way.

I’m not saying that I’m going to go out and become a drag-racing junkie, but I am saying that it’s good to be comfortable in your own skin regardless of what others may be thinking. And by the way, towards the end of the weekend, a pair of dragsters screamed past me at over 300 mph. They clocked in at a 4.61 seconds for a ¼-mile. They went so fast that my whole body shook. I admit that I verbally said for the 1st time in my life: “Whooo…eeee!!”. Maybe I fit in with that crowd more than I thought!!

About a month and a half ago I wrote about how my wife and I had started doing the “P-90-X” workout routine. Well, 7 weeks later we are still “Bringing it” each and every day. My goal was to get bigger and stronger. Ang’s goal was to lose a few pounds and get toned-up. Well, I can officially say we are achieving our goals for one another, but unfortunately not for ourselves. So far, I’ve LOST weight (about 4 pounds), and Angela has GAINED muscle!!

It’s odd how things like that can happen. We go into something expecting one thing, but end up getting something entirely different. I’m proud to say that my attitude over the past 49 days has been the same: Do your best each day and after all is said and done, I have faith that I’ll like the results. Too many times in my life I’ll try something for a little while and then stop doing it because of (what I perceive as) a lack of results along the way. The truth is, I need to stick with something all the way until the end and THEN look at the results.

But isn’t it hard not to look at the results along the way? I’m reminded about saving money: We set a goal to save X-amount of dollars by the time the year is over. Then after one month we see that we are way off our goal. It’s so easy to just give up and say, “Hey, what the heck!! This whole ‘saving money’ stuff doesn’t work.” But the thing is, there are other factors that may have influenced how much we saved for that particular month. If we can just keep “fighting the good fight”, everything will balance itself out and there’s a great chance we can achieve the goal we had set.

So what am I trying to say?? Well, I’m going to do my very best to finish out the last 41 days the same way I started the first 49. In the end, will it be worth it?? Absolutely!! Not because of how good a shape we will or won’t be in, but rather BECAUSE WE FINISHED IT TOGETHER. All I know is that the results in the mirror or on the scale are not what motivate me. I can’t speak for Angela, but what motivates me is the thought of achieving something TOGETHER. The idea that we chose to do something difficult TOGETHER, that we followed-through and completed the task, fires me up.

In the big scheme of things I understand that being in great physical shape is relatively meaningless. But in the big scheme of things, doing something difficult that challenges both people in a marriage is something that can help keep the pair united when times are tough. I know you can’t build your marriage on the foundation of P-90-X, but knowing that you’ve achieved something difficult together can/will help the relationship in the future when the tough times truly come.

On Thursday afternoon around 1:00 PM I finished my ninth straight day of sports camps at Brother Rice High School. I truly enjoyed helping out the kids with their athletic skills, especially the ones who wanted to learn more. Besides teaching the fundamentals of baseball and basketball, the nine days quickly turned into a “competition-fest” where candy bars were given away as prizes as an incentive to get the kids excited about being there, and excited about whatever drill we were trying to do. By the way, for anyone out there who is inclined to work with grade-schoolers, I’d highly recommend candy. The kids will do just about anything for candy. Actually, this past week has shown me that they’ll do just about anything for even the POSSIBILITY that they COULD get some candy.

So after giving away roughly 100 candy bars, here are some of the ways that the kids earned them during the nine-day stretch of Camps:

1. Whiffle ball champions (team award)
2. Long-toss champs
3. Most accurate “strike-thrower”
4. Robbing a home run during batting practice
5. Most home runs while hitting off of a tee
6. For not crying after getting hit in the face with a whiffle ball
7. Most free throws made in a row
8. Most jumps in 45 seconds with a jump rope
9. Lightening champions
10. Relay race champions (team award)
11. Best dribbler award

And the list goes on and on. Basically, you could get a candy bar for just about anything. Ultimately though, the reason we gave them away was so that the kids would be ENTHUSIASTIC about what we were trying to teach them.

The best story of the past two weeks for me occurred during our 4th-6th grade basketball camp. There were 24 kids at the camp. We split them up randomly into four teams of six players. Each team was then coached by one of our high school players and was given an NBA team name like the “Lakers” or the “Spurs”. One of the groups was given the “Celtics” as their team name. When they heard they were the Celtics, they were all super pumped-up. After all, the Celtics had just won the NBA Championship less than a week before. Unfortunately, after just one day of playing together, their excitement quickly changed to frustration and apathy.

On day one the Celtics got hammered twice and then eked out a tie in their third game to finish the day 0-2-1. The whole team was saddened by the results. No matter how much the coaches tried to encourage them with our words, the team just couldn’t pull it together. It didn’t get much better on day two. The second day they went 1-2-0 which put them in last place out of the four teams that they were competing against. Things weren’t looking too good for the Celtics.

On day three the strangest thing happened: We had a high school player from our program volunteer to help out the Celtics for the last day. He wasn’t even at the camp the first two days. He wasn’t even scheduled to be there in the first place. So this player helps coach the Celtics for the last day of Competitions. Immediately he comes into their huddle and yells out, “Who are we??” and one little 60-lb 4th grader half-whispers: “Celtics”. This high school player looks right at the kid and says, “I can’t hear you. Who are we” and the kid yells out, “Celtics!!”. A few of his teammates chimed in as well. This “dialogue” continued for about 6 or 7 more times until the whole team was worked into a frenzy.

Once the Celtics were fired-up, this coach started running up and down the court with them, and every time his players made an aggressive play, he’d give them a high-five at the next whistle. Amazingly, the Celtics went 2-0-1 on the last day and earned the #3 seed for the tournament. They went on to win the first round game of the playoffs and then lose narrowly in the final game for the Championship.

The whole scene was hilarious to watch. This one coach injected his team with so much ENTHUSIASM just by being himself and by believing in his team. It was great!! It showed me how powerful one person’s attitude can be when it comes to being in a group setting. This high school coach turned a team of players who were feeling sorry for themselves into a team of winners who competed hard and had a great time during the last day. It was a powerful reminder for me: If I want my class, or my team, or my future family (Lord-willing) to have a great passion for what they are doing, it starts at the top with the leader (me). People feed off of the leader’s ENTHUSIASM. May I always be enthusiastic about the things that are important to me, and may I always remember that there are more ways to “fire-up” the kids than by simply giving them candy!!

There have only been a couple of infomercials I’ve seen in my lifetime that actually sold me on their product. I can remember seeing so many other ones that I can laugh at, or ignore without even giving it a second thought. Remember these beauties:

1. The “Flo-Bee”: It vacuums your hair while cutting it.
2. Spray-on HAIR!!. It’s for bald men, or balding women, and you spray it on the bald spot to create the illusion of actual hair.
3. The Magic Bullet: Great for omelettes, salsa, and salads.
4. The “Ginzu” knife. It can cut through your shoe, or even a lead pipe if you ever needed it to. Or it can cut through both, and then be used to cut a tomato!! It’s like having a fly swatter that can break concrete. Is it really necessary??
5. The small-sized rotisserie machine: You just “set it, and forget it!!”.
6. Tae-Bo: How can you stop Billy Blanks?!?!

There have only been 2 things that I’ve ever bought. One was the “Jack Lelane power juicer”. If you’ve seen the infomercial and resisted buying it, tell me how you did it because I was totally captivated. How can you deny the power of the juice when the guy selling the machine is like 92 years old and can still do push-ups like a machine?!
The second thing that I (we) bought was the P-90X workout Routine. Some of you have probably seen the commercials for it. They show a seemingly endless string of people who are in phenomenal shape. Now, I’ve worked out regularly on my own for the last 12 years of my life, but I don’t look like those people. I KNOW I don’t look like the people from the P-90X pictures, but it’s NOT a mystery as to why. In order to look like them, you have to workout 1) with extreme intensity, 2) with incredible discipline, 3) essentially everyday 4) and you have to eat the proper foods ALL THE TIME!! There’s a reason why they look the way they do: It’s a total commitment for them. You don’t “roll out of bed” and look like that by accident. It takes HARD work.

So basically my wife was the one who ultimately “pulled the trigger” on this activity. We are now committed to being work-out partners for the next 3 months. The phrase I kept mentioning to her was: “Have you counted the cost??” Biblically speaking, God’s Word uses the illustration of building a tower. The Word warns us not to start building until we know exactly what it’ll cost to get the job done. Apparently Angela and I counted the same amount of money and came to 2 totally different totals. My total said we don’t have enough to do it, but Angela’s total showed that we have more than enough!!

Well, we’re currently on day #4. As expected, I’m sore pretty much everywhere, craving my normal food in my normal portions, and I have a whole workout staring me in the face for later on this afternoon. I haven’t pushed myself like this physically in quite some time. The great thing is this:

1. My wife is right alongside me (what more could I ask for).
2. I get to challenge myself daily to see what I’m made of.
3. I’m stepping out of my comfort zone, which is what I should be doing daily anyway.

I’m glad my wife had the guts to get this routine going. If she hadn’t ordered it, I’d never be doing something like this. I guess her ability to count the cost is better than mine. I guess we’ll see in 86 days.

A few months ago I was asked to coach an 11-and-under baseball team for the upcoming spring and summer season. It seemed to fit into my current schedule, so I accepted the job and started right away. The group of kids that I get to work with has been great so far. They come to practice, they listen quietly when I try to teach, and then they attempt to do the things that I’ve been emphasizing.

We’ve only played 4 games so far this season with probably close to 50 more to go before all is said and done. Each day I try to give the kids 100% enthusiasm and 100% effort in everything that I do. I guess it’s fitting that I do so, because that’s exactly what I ask of them.

Now it’s my feeling that the kids feel a large amount of pressure when it comes to their performance. This is especially true when it comes to hitting. There’s no other place in sports that gets so easily and so regularly exploited than a bad hitter. If you happen to be a bad hitter, baseball becomes one of the most frustrating and most embarrassing games you can possibly play. There’s a feeling of helplessness that is unexplainable unless you’ve been in the box trying to hit a pitcher who is flat out better than you. There’s nobody on your team that can help when you stand in the box. It’s just you and the pitcher.

At a practice a few days ago I had the chance to work with an assistant coach’s son on his hitting. The kid waited patiently through a 2-hour practice just so that I could watch him swing and then give some advice that would (hopefully) help. He was a great helper at our practice. He didn’t distract anyone. He just waited until practice was over before he came over to work with me 1-on-1.

So I watched him swing 10 or 15 times and didn’t really see anything blatantly wrong. So I talked a little strategy and threw another 10 or 15 pitches. Still I saw nothing. On the third round I finally caught what I was looking for. He was committing the barrel of his bat a little too early, thus he’d “roll over” pitches on the outside part of the plate instead of driving the ball on a line up the middle or to the opposite field. When I finally saw it, I got all excited immediately. I knew exactly what he was doing wrong and I knew exactly what adjustment needed to be made.

So I enthusiastically came to him and told him what he needed to do. Without questioning me, the young player made the adjustment like I had told him to, and sure enough, 10 of the next 11 swings were line drives to every part of the field. As each ball shot off his bat, I became more and more excited. I could see the smile on his face after about the 5th or 6th swing because whatever adjustment he made, was now helping him hit the ball as he ought to.

We stopped the lesson, gathered the balls, and shook hands with a smile as we left the field. The player was happy because he had a problem that was fixed in the span of 20 minutes. I would imagine it was well-worth the 2-hour wait if it’s going to result in some solid base hits in the games to come. He left the field with a smile. The dad was happy because he was hoping I could help his son and he could see right away that I did. So he also left with a smile. Finally, I was happy, because besides being pursued as an “expert”, which is extremely flattering in and of itself, I actually found the mistake that could be easily corrected. So I, too, left with a smile.

Now what’s the moral of the story?? It’s crazy how something as simple as playing baseball could bring joy to three people’s lives. All of us bonded on that evening by playing a game together. And even though in the big picture, hitting a baseball is relatively meaningless, the whole dynamic of that meeting on the baseball field was anything but meaningless. Here’s why:

**You have a father who LOVES his son. He wants what’s best for his son at any cost, even if it’s INCONVENIENT for him. He’s willing to give his son his best wisdom in order to help the son with his problem. And if the Father himself can’t solve his son’s problem, he’s WISE enough and HUMBLE enough to seek out someone who can help.

**You have the son who is HUMBLE enough to admit he has a problem. He is PATIENT enough to sit through a 2-hour waiting period where he gets no attention just for the hope that his problem might be solved after the waiting period is over. The son TRUSTS his father enough to go along with the Father’s plan even if it’s INCONVENIENT. Then when the time comes, the son displays even more TRUST by listening to the random stranger who tells him how to fix the problem.

**You have the coach who is UNSELFISH enough to go beyond the call of duty to HELP someone in need. Even though practice is over and even though it’s INCONVENIENT, he’s willing to TRY to HELP. He knows what it’s like to have a problem, and he knows what people have done for him in the past. The coach ENTHUSIASTICALLY gives his time and his expertise in order to fix the problem that he sees. He CONFIDENTLY gives advice when he sees what needs to be done, and then he shares in the JOY when the problem gets fixed.

Sometimes a problem shouldn’t be kept to yourself. It may be INCONVENIENT for you to ask for help. It may even be INCONVENIENT for everyone who’s involved in the solution. But in the end, all who are involved in the solution get to share the joy, and all 3 are better off than when they started. It was encouraging for me to be a part of this story. I think it’s obvious that this whole dynamic applies to more than just baseball.

I’m more than half way through the 16 day separation from my wife. No, we’re not on bad terms or anything: She took a trip to South Africa to help distribute medical supplies to people who are in need. She left 10 and half days ago, and she’s scheduled to be back in a little less than 6 days from right now. So what has my life been like since she left?? All in all, it’s been pretty good. For some reason, I feel like I’m receiving a large amount of prayer right now. I’m not sure why I feel this way, but I feel a great sense of peace that has been lacking at times in the past. My gut instinct is that my wife, and others from the church, are praying for me while we are apart from one another, probably even more so than usual. And let me say, it certainly helps.

I know I’m praying for her more often now that she’s gone. It’s kind of opened my eyes to what my prayer life should be like. Why is it that it takes a trip to the other side of the world for me to think more regularly about my wife?? I guess it makes sense, but it’s no excuse. It’s a perfect example of how I take things for granted in my everyday life. Think about everything we do on a daily basis: We’ll pray fervently for God to put us in a job that we can enjoy, but do we give prayers of thanksgiving regularly once we have that dream job?? We’ll pray unceasingly for God to set us up with the spouse of our dreams, but then once we’re married for a time, the amount of our prayers for our spouse dips off quite a bit. We’ll pray for God to protect us on our 5-hour drive to Chicago, but what about the 5-minute drive to the grocery store?? Shouldn’t we be praying for that as well??

More than anything, this is what God is putting on my heart since Angela left. There are SO MANY things I can pray about daily. I should be praying for the things I take for granted. The Bible tells us to pray unceasingly. Part of me thought that it would be a little bit of an “overkill” if I did that because I’d run out of things to pray for. But in reality, the list of things to bring to God in prayer is almost endless. I remember Cliff Johnson telling a story about how they did a prayer room at his old church and that people would spend hours in there praying. At the end they’d say that they needed more time because there was so much more to bring to God. I thought that was impossible. Now I’m starting to see the truth of what those people were saying. It’s too bad it took a week and a half away from my wife to realize it.

On a side note, for those of you who are interested, my beard is only semi-ugly right now. Just give it a few more days!! Also, I spent a combined $39.00 on groceries these past 2 weeks. I’d need another 4 weeks to completely clear out all the food we have stored up at home. Lastly, God has put something on my heart. The very best gift I can give Angela when she gets home is NOT: me picking her up at the airport with a smile and a lousy beard. It IS: a thorough cleaning of the house on Saturday night similar to the way she cleans when people come over. I’ll quarantine the house from myself from midnight Saturday until she arrives home on Sunday so she can see “the palace” cleaned for her arrival. There’s a little free nugget of Godly wisdom for all the men out there, so take note and thank me later!!

Over the Easter Break I had a chance to visit my in-laws from Holland, MI. My wife and I not only saw her grandparents, but also her immediate family, which now includes a 7-month old baby boy, who in a word is “phenomenal”. Has anyone besides me noticed that when a baby is in the picture, the child becomes the center of everyone’s attention? We’ll all sit there and react to every single thing that they do. Instead of watching TV or a movie, we’ll put the baby on the ground and watch him move around. He looks at us, we look at him: not a whole lot of activity and yet time still flies by. It’s pretty odd to be a part of a dinner where it lasts an hour and a half, there is no conversation whatsoever between the adults, and yet the meal is considered a total joy to be a part of.

Anyway, I noticed something about our newfound 7-year-old nephew. One of the qualities that makes him so cute is that he’s such “a happy baby”. After all, he smiles and laughs all the time when people are around him. Each family member was able to hold the baby, and when they did, without failing, every one of us would smile at the baby. Sure enough, when we would hold him and smile, he would smile right back. When we played peek-a-boo, he would continue to smile and laugh. It made for an entertaining weekend, one where both Angela and I really enjoyed our time, especially with the little guy.

Is it any surprise though, that babies, in general, seem to be pretty happy?? Couldn’t it be argued that the baby is just mimicking what they see us doing?? We smile at them, and then they smile at us. We laugh, and then they laugh. We stick our tongue out, or make funny sounds, and then they do the same. It turns out that mimicking behavior is one of our inmost instincts. Try this experiment with others: When they are talking to you, politely wipe your mouth as though you’re trying to brush something off your face. More often than not, they will wipe their own mouth the same way you did. Do the same thing with yawning. Have you ever noticed that when you see someone else yawn, it makes you want to yawn too?

Copying others’ behavior is something that we do from the time we’re born to the time we die. Think about the people who we work with who are constantly negative. It seems like everyday they have something new to complain about. Do you ever find yourself doing the exact same thing when you’re around them?? What about the church crew that you hang out with. Do you find yourself changing your lingo when you get in their group?? I know this: in everyday life, I hardly ever swear, but if you put me around people who swear regularly, I’ll find myself letting a few slip here and there.

All I’m trying to point out is that copying others’ behavior is something we all do. Couldn’t I use that fact to influence others in the right way?? What if I decided to be positive in the face criticism?? What if I encouraged those around me?? What if I spoke kindly about people who weren’t in the room with me?? Could I glorify God by doing those simple things?? I think so. And I’ll bet you, based on what was just said, those around me would instinctively start doing the same thing.

Well, UPWARDS Basketball recently had their closing ceremonies, which wrapped up another successful season. Woodside sponsors this basketball league, which puts close to 700 kids between the ages of 7 and 12 on a basketball or cheerleading team. There have been very few things that I’ve enjoyed volunteering my time for more than this league. The kids and the parents are great. I have nothing but good things to say about the whole experience. On a side note, Woodside recently had an event that brought in comedians from all over the place. I’m sure they were quite funny. If they ever ran out of material though, I would suggest volunteering to coach and Upwards Basketball Team. This past season had too many funny moments to count.
I understand that it’s hard to laugh unless you’re there to see who the actual kids are and what they actually said. I need to relive a couple of the highlights from this past year for you all. First off, Ben Kelly (also from Woodside) helped me coach the 5th and 6th grade team. His attitude is awesome, and he certainly helped keep things fun for me and for the kids. Ask him about our kids and see if he can talk about the season without smiling. He won’t be able to do it.
The season always begins the same way. I come in and blow the whistle to make sure that I can establish control of these kids right from the start. After creating order, the next few weeks are a chance for me to get a feel for what kind of kids and talent we have. What everyone needs to understand is that all kids would take the same approach to basketball if you left them alone. They want to shoot baskets from as far away as they possibly can.
So we get to the second practice of the year and by now I’ve established that the way to score is to pass the ball to an open teammate close to the basket. Every time they pass to an open teammate I celebrate and go crazy so that they’ll keep doing it. The system seemed to be working well except for one player. His favorite move was to put his head down, dribble as close to the basket as he could get, and then shoot a shot in traffic.
After two full practices of basically doing the same thing, I continually encouraged this player to pass the ball. However, passing was not something he liked to do. So he would keep forcing bad shots and I would get frustrated. Finally, this player went overboard. He was standing like 25 feet away from the basket, and he received a pass from his teammate. He promptly took one dribble toward the basket and heaved up a prayer from the 3-point line. The ball faded way short. It was about three feet short of the rim and about four feet too far to the right.
I get ticked off, so I say out loud to him, “So-and-so, we can do better than that. It’s really hard to make a shot from that far away”. He listens to me and promptly chimes back, “Far-away shots are my specialty”. When I hear that, I just about died laughing. This, coming from the kid who has a tough time making lay-ups, let alone 18-footers. The little 11-year old was convinced that this was his specialty?? I’ve coached All-Catholic players in High School who don’t have the green light to shoot from that far away. I just thought it was funny that his first thought was that I was completely wrong even though he couldn’t shoot the ball into a dumpster from that far away let alone an 18-inch cylinder suspended at 10 feet.
It’s okay, he possibly made me laugh even harder about four weeks later when we were in game five. He was guarding a short kid who was really quick in period two. Our team was ahead by four points after the period ended. So he and the rest of his teammates came out of the game. When they came out, Ben and I usually encouraged them for whatever they did well. So when I got to So-and-so I told him, “Great job, Man!! You really rebounded like crazy, and you were really aggressive when the ball was on the floor. But, I need you to stay in front of that guy you were guarding. He dribbled around you and you never shuffled your feet like we had practiced. I mean, if you had to guard him again, couldn’t you move a little quicker to stay in front of him?”
No joke, the kid is drinking a blue Gatorade. He takes a big swig while I’m talking, and when he comes up for air, he has a blue Gatorade mustache that almost reaches to his nose and extends past both corners of his mouth. He listens, and thinks for a second and then comes back at me with, “Hey…speed beats Braun every time”. And then he took another huge swig of Gatorade as though that was the end of the conversation. Same thing: I just about died when I heard him say that. First off, the kid weighs like 80 lbs, so “braun” doesn’t make my top 10 words to describe him. Secondly, where did he learn the word “braun” anyway? Third, he makes it sound like there’s no way he could keep up with the kid because he’s slower. If one of my high school kids ever said that, I would have lost it!! Fourth, how can I look at that blue mustache without laughing? Finally, is the 11-year-old with the Gatorade mustache teaching me a lesson in life here?? I think he is.
Even if the millions of people who read this can’t see the humor, Ben and I will never forget it. If I shared everything that went on, this article would last forever. All I know is that, there’s nothing like laughing until you cry. These kids allowed me to do that at times, and I’ll never forget it.

I’ve been coaching basketball for the past five years now, three of which have been at the Varsity level at a local high school. I’m always surprised at how much I learn each year from the kids that I coach. As a teacher/coach, often times I’ll fall into the mindset of seeing myself as the “fountain of all wisdom”. I’ll constantly look for areas I can help the students (athletes) in a certain area, or more importantly help improve their lives in some small way. It never ceases to amaze me, though, how much I can learn from the kids. This past week was yet another example of how a player of mine taught me an important lesson on life instead of the other way around- how we think it’s supposed to work!

The basketball team I coached for had an outstanding season. Not only did we win a League Championship, but we also had a stellar record, the best record we’ve had at our school in 20 years. More importantly though, the kids really loved being a part of the team. They played hard, they practiced hard, they laughed a lot, they pushed each other, and they encouraged one another. It was the first time in my 5 years of coaching that I saw a team-first approach from everyone involved from top to bottom. Normally you’ll have at least a few players who will complain about playing time or about not scoring enough points. Not this season. The team loved playing together and had tremendous camaraderie.

Unfortunately, the team lost in the first round of the playoffs. In the locker room after the game, myself and the head coach were obviously unhappy, but it would have been impossible to ignore the tremendous season they had. It was so much fun being around them from beginning to end. After both of the coaches gave a short speech, the seniors stood up and volunteered to say something to the rest of their teammates. A “parting shot” if you will…

Each player reiterated what I’ve already said above, but one player in particular stood out by saying something I’ll never forget. This player rarely played in the games. He was a great teammate the entire season, and I can say confidently that nobody enjoyed being a part of the team more than he did. The whole season he would energize practice by diving on the floor for loose balls, or by joking around with the coaches, or by making a great play against the starters and then playfully “talking trash” before the next play started. He was simply awesome to have around. So as he stood up, he started sharing his wisdom with the younger kids. He basically said, “I like to have fun no matter what I’m doing. If you’re not enjoying yourself, it’s your own fault. Life is what you make of it.”

Afterwards he sat down. He didn’t cry or anything. He just said what was on his heart, and it couldn’t have been said any better. Here’s a kid who hardly played in the games at all. He rarely scored. He never got his name in the paper. He didn’t get a basketball scholarship. But based on his speech, he had the “greatest time ever, being a part of this team”. How’s that possible?? Most kids (or even adults) couldn’t accept the role that he was willing to play. How did he do it??

It was his ATTITUDE. A positive attitude can carry you through just about any situation. The things that the sports world values as being important: playing time, accolades, awards, points scored, highlight plays, etc… were not the things that this player valued. He valued having fun, his teammates, winning, being a part of a great team, and laughing. Having a great ATTITUDE points directly to what your daily goals are and what your daily priorities are. I would also say, the people that I come across who have the best attitudes are the ones who “play by their own set of rules” as opposed to the world’s rules. This quote from Colossians struck me when I thought of this player:

“Since you died with Christ to the basic principles of this world, why, as though you still belonged to it, do you submit to its rules?” Col 2:20

Whether he’s a Christian or not, he decided not to “submit to (the world’s) rules”. HE decided what was important to HIM, and as a result, he was a one-of-a-kind teammate with an unbelievably good attitude from start to finish. And, I think he really enjoyed the season to its fullest. We can all have a great ATTITUDE no matter what we’re involved in. Enjoying whatever we are involved in is a choice. I’m not embarrassed to say that this is a case where the student (player) taught the teacher (coach). I’ll try to have a great ATTITUDE in everything I do, and I’ll never forget the life lesson that this player shared at the end of his basketball career.

My wife and I were at Starbucks a few days ago. We saw a young couple talking to an older man, and it appeared to us that they may be newly engaged. We assumed that they were doing marital counseling with a volunteer from their church, and based on the smiles that were etched on their faces, I’m sure they were very much in love. As we had our drinks Angela asked me what advice I would give them if I was doing the counseling.

The first thing that jumped into my mind was this: “Embrace the inevitable molding that is about to take place. Learn to be patient; don’t fight it.” The ironic thing is that Angela’s advice might have been the same thing! I look at our marriage and often times pat myself on the back for being so patient while she shops, gets ready to go out, or socializes after group events. But then I forget how patient she has become when I leave crumbs on the counter, leave toothpaste residue in the sink, leave dirty fingerprints on the microwave, or leave food drippings on the stove top. The thing is, after 4 years of marriage I can kind of laugh at the things that used to get me fired up. Hopefully, she can too.

The truth is, the sooner I learned that getting things my way is highly over-rated, the more patient I became, and the better our relationship has been as a result. Marriage has shown me two things about myself. First, I’m not as great as I once thought I was. And second, I’m not as patient as I need to be. But, looking at those two points, pride and selfishness (i.e. wanting things my way), I realized that all humans struggle with them. Maybe I’m more normal than I thought.

What better way to grow closer to God than through marriage! Marriage, over time, reveals who I am, both to myself and to my wife. It gives another person an honest glimpse into who I am on the inside. Instead of viewing things the same way as I always have for the rest of my life, marriage gives me an excuse to change for the better.

And I’ll add this- willingness to change for Angela’s sake encourages me more than anything. If I’m willing to change for her, I’ll definitely be willing to change for God. Willingness to change for the better is a sign of humility. I never worry for a second if my wife is “walking all over me” (which she doesn’t). Ultimately, I’d rather grow in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control than have things my way.