I remember the very moment that I became shy. Silly as it sounds, it was the last day of fifth grade, and as the whole class sat at their desks devouring their ice cream, I was in front of them presenting a project. At that age, I was notorious for boring my classmates with excruciatingly long reports. They were so boring that sometimes I would even totally zone out as I stood there reading. On this particular occasion, I stood there thinking about a boy in my class that I had a huge crush on. I suddenly realized that he was sitting in the audience (duh), watching and listening to everything I said. All at once my eyes began to water, my face turned red, and I became somewhat out of breath. My heart was racing as I became more aware of how I sounded, looked, and how much longer I still had to read. I have struggled with shyness ever since.

Before that time in my life, I was always the girl to tell you exactly what I was thinking. I was really outgoing and sometimes maybe even loud, and one of my favorite things to do was be in plays. I would sing solos and all kinds of stuff, but I can think of so many things now that I would rather do instead! As I got older, I remained significantly quieter, especially when meeting new people, although I love doing it. If I knew someone really well, I’d talk their head right off, but when it came to meeting others, that wasn’t exactly the case. And every time I had to get up in front of the class I would pretty much faint. No joke.

So after awhile I guess I just started accepting myself as this relatively quiet person. I never really saw it holding me back from anything. I mean it’s important to accept yourself, right? So there I was in Lighthouse on a random Sunday night, listening to Cliff speak. He was talking about things that could be holding us back from a deeper relationship with God, whether good or bad. After singing our closing songs, he stood and asked us to form a triangle with two other people around us, hold hands, and pray about what in our lives was holding us back. The first thing that came to mind was my shyness. And believe it or not I was afraid to pray out loud! I was afraid that my mind was going to go blank just like it did every other time I spoke in front of others. But as my turn came, I threw everything on the Lord and just began speaking. And I didn’t even think about what I had to say next. It’s like my heart was pouring out to Him, talking about struggles that were from deep inside. I wasn’t nervous or scared or anything. I was just me, and I hadn’t experienced a feeling like that in forever.

After those few moments, I felt like something changed. I felt like God was saying, “See, you can do it Christy” and He was cheering me on. He made me realize that I need to push my own limits all the time to become closer to Him, and to also bring others closer. How was I ever supposed to be able to lead others to Christ if I was resting on my shyness like a crutch? I left feeling like a new person, so excited and ready to start over. I love when that happens! Everybody has a limit in their lives, and it’s important to break through it and live for Christ without any boundaries. Just as in Philippians 4:13- “I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me.” With God, there is nothing that we can’t overcome.

Father, how can this be?
All this confusion that resides in me
How do I not understand my very own heart?
From my mind it’s worlds apart.
But deceitful above all else is this heart of mine
So I search for truth that is Thine.
Father, let Your word wash over me
And in Your time, from this confusion, I’ll be set free.

Life’s experience has left me stained
But You always have purpose, nothing is in vain.
All I ask is to be one with You
This way I may know what is true.
Your truth will mend my brokenness
It will keep me straight in this world’s wideness.
So I delight in You alone
And lay my desires at Your throne.
Father, let Your word wash over me
And in Your time, I know, I’ll be set free!

No matter how many times I read the story, I’m always a little bit surprised when I realize that the Lord spoke with Moses face to face, the way one would speak to a friend.

There are days that I forget this. I forget that He delights in me. That He wants to show me His glory, and grant me rest. That He desires to speak to me, and wants me to trust His voice. I forget that He is already dwelling in my future. And that He has a perfect path set out for me.

I resort to my timeline, succumb to my anxieties and let myself forget.

It hurts me to even acknowledge this truth. I want to always trust Him as my best friend, to put my heart willingly into His hands without trying to grab it back. I really want to walk by faith. Sometimes I’m successful and sometimes I’m not. But where is the line drawn between desiring these things and actually accomplishing them?

I think about this a lot. Is the desire of wanting to depend solely on God with the day-to-day stuff enough to make me actually do it? Or does it take more than that?

Maybe that line is blurred, and it’s a little bit of both. Desiring unfaltering faith and trust in God should bring us to our knees in prayer. It should make us realize that we’ll never get there on our own, that we need to pray for God to provide the faith and trust before we can truly see Him as our friend.

It’s through this prayer that we are able to lay our lives down at His feet, and seek His will instead of our own. I pray that we be so intertwined with our Saviour that we won’t be able to distinguish our will from His.

As I attempt to describe what God did in Lighthouse during 40, I am tempted to list all that was done. But to be honest with you, all we really did during the 960 hours was to OPEN OUR EYES. That’s all. We opened our eyes and began to look for God.And we found Him. Wow – did we ever. We found Him at 3 in the morning in the Prayer Room as we wept over the cries written on the Wailing Wall. We found Him in the tears shed by a couple that found love and compassion after losing yet another round to infertility. We found Him in the pages of His brilliant and inspired Word that He has given to us. We found Him in the healing that he gave to those who fervently asked Him for it. We found Him in the YES. We found Him in the NO. We found Him in the silence. We found Him in the artwork that flowed from awestruck worshippers. We found Him in the poetry that was composed in the tear-stained journal. We found Him in the eyes of the poor and needy that were fed and encouraged.We found that He was there all along. We had just been walking through life with our eyes closed. I want to keep my eyes open. I want to live wide-awake. I pray that we will never again doze off into an apathetic catnap – putting down our sword and taking off our armor. I pray that when my head starts to nod that my brothers and sisters would help me stay awake. I want to continue to look for God through prayer (we prayed for 960 hours in a row), His Word (many read the Bible through in 40 days), in serving others (completed over 40 service projects in Metro Detroit), and in worshipping Him with our lives.Now that our eyes are open, “Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.” Amen and amen.

It’s always tough to approach a worship album for review. While the music, instrumentation, and album structure can be criticized, it remains difficult to do the same for the lyrics, depth of emotion, and passion on the disc as they can be perceived as inherently present, intrinsically true, and undoubtly good. As good critics know, as opposed to coming across snobby, shooting mere opinion as fact, it is better to acknowledge one’s own biases and personal preferences, so feel free to disagree about Tomlin’s latest.

Among today’s worship crew Tomlin has received the most polarized reviews. While his audience swoons over his awe-inspiring singles which have become staples in most American church’s worship sets, critics often remain slightly skeptical, judging his albums on a more holistic basis as opposed to the singles (see “How Great is Our God” and “Made to Worship”). His latest “Hello Love” may escape said criticism.

While the album gets off to a relatively slow start with “Sing Sing Sing,” the disc as a whole is relatively energetic, passionate, and authentic. Tomlin’s voice has been brought “up front,” and drives the music just as much as the background instruments. “Love” is a memorable African stylized track, featuring a children’s choir singing in their native tongue, and “Praise the Father, Praise the Son” is a rather simplistic song which feels slightly less “Tomlin” and more traditional contemporary worship. (Oxymoron? Think Sonicflood). It is without a doubt that many of these songs will be incorporated into church’s worship sets. The most awe-inspiring, “God of this City,” has already made its way into rotation, with others in line.

The only drawback to “Hello Love” is that it seems to lose a bit of its initial flare after first listen. Although it’s likeliness to be enjoyed a second and third time is certain, it’s not an album that could be spun multiple times in one sitting. Regardless, if you’re a Tomlin fan “Hello Love” was made for you. If you’re a worship leader, “Hello Love” was made for you. If you’re the typical contemporary worship fan “Hello Love” was made for you. However, if you’re a music enthusiast who listens to new music on a daily basis, “Hello Love” will be best utilized for it’s more popular songs, on a great worship playlist.

Rating: 3 out of 5
Street Date: September 2nd, 2008
Label: SixStepRecords

Tracklisting:

1.) Sing Sing Sing
2.) Jesus Messiah
3.) You Lifted Me Out
4.) God Of This City
5.) I Will Rise
6.) Love
7.) Praise the Father, Praise The Son
8.) My Deliverer
9.) With me
10.) Exalted (Yahweh)
11.) God Almighty
12.) All The Way My Savior Leads Me

GENRE: MODERN WORSHIP
LABEL: SIXSTEPRECORDS
RELEASEDATE: AUGUST 19, 2008

Nutshell Version:

“The Bright Sadness” features 12 new tracks that are guaranteed to make the worship rotation in every postmodern worship service within two weeks of its release. While not reaching the heights of “Flying Into Daybreak,” there are certainly several gems to be considered on Hall’s most recent offering. Even a lesser effort from Hall eclipses the efforts of his contemporaries. Fans of his earlier work and modern praise and worship will greatly enjoy the album. Not only that, they’ll greatly benefit from listening.

Full Version:

I have always considered Charlie Hall to be the most underrated worship leader to come out the 268generation, the minds behind the Passion conferences that are so wildly popular among twentysomethings. Everyone goes ballistic over the David Crowder Band (“Remedy: Club Tour Edition” - August 19) and Chris Tomlin (“Hello Love” – September 2) whenever they come out with a new album. Yet, lyrically, I have always felt as if Hall were the better of the three. Now, he returns to the airwaves with his fourth studio effort. “The Bright Sadness” features 12 new tracks that are guaranteed to make the worship rotation in every postmodern worship service within two weeks of its release. While not reaching the heights of “Flying Into Daybreak,” there are certainly several gems to be considered on Hall’s most recent offering.

“Chainbreaker” starts things out on a particularly high note as Hall reminds listeners that if they are in Jesus then their chains have been broken. It is destined to be a modern classic worship piece in the tradition of “Indescribable” and “O Praise Him.” The instruments are strong, Hall’s vocals shine through the din, and the lyrics are solid. The second track, “New Year” is a ballade-esque number that “was written after a long period of difficult pain and confusion,” according to Hall and looks forward to leaving behind things of the past and toward a bright new future.

“The Second Alive” and “Hookers And Robbers” are the kinds of songs I point to in order to make my point that Hall is a fantastic psalmist for a new generation of worshipers. The former is probably one of the most rock-infused songs I’ve heard out of the worship quarter. It’s great stuff that could burn up the Top 40 if it tried. The latter is…well…it’s called “Hookers And Robbers!” What more do you want? Either way, it’s a song written to those on the fringes, imploring them to ‘Come as you are.’ Inspired by excerpts from ‘The Book of Common Prayer,’ the album’s closer “Mystery” is by far the best track on the album. It is beautifully written and beautifully delivered. The instruments melt together with Hall’s smooth and reflective voice, providing a symphony of praise to the Father.

The major “miss” on the album is “Thrill.” To be honest, it’s one of those tracks that makes me scratch my head and wonder, “What were you thinking, Charlie?” It’s kind of hokey, cheesy, and so many bad things that people have come to associate with Christian music. A song like this may have been popular in the mid-90’s from the likes of Maranatha, but I expect more from Hall.

The majority of “The Bright Sadness” is pretty stellar. Again, I don’t think it reaches the heights of his previous studio effort, but even a lesser effort from Hall eclipses the efforts of his contemporaries. Fans of his earlier work and modern praise and worship will greatly enjoy the album. Not only that, they’ll greatly benefit from listening.

Track Listing
1. Chainbreaker
2. New Year
3. Walk The World
4. My Brightness
5. Scenes
6. Thrill
7. The Second Alive
8. Hookers And Robbers
9. Bloom Again
10. You Are God
11. Knit My Heart
12. Mystery

Broken I feel,
confused and alone,
searching, seeking… lost

Spinning slowly,
grasping and grabbing,
trying to take hold.

So tired and worn
pleasing and giving,
yet losing who I am.

Take my hand,
God and King,
have mercy on my soul.

Give me life,
now and always,
fill me with Your joy.

Now reaching out,
wholly and true,
embracing those around.

May my worship be pure,
Father and Savior,
living only for You.

Filled I am,
content and guided,
searching, seeking… found.

Written in the journal from the Prayer Room during 40.

Some music is slick. Polished and produced to a point that it sounds best on an official studio recording. Some music is best experienced live. Worship music falls into the latter category. It can only reach its full potential in such an environment; where the atmosphere, others partaking, and sense of vulnerability create an experience that is unlike any other. The Remedy Club Tour offers just that.

What may be the curve ball of “Remedy Club” is that it doesn’t bare similarities to worship giant Hillsong, who have seemingly mastered the art of mixing production with live music. In fact, “Remedy Club” although live worship, feels entirely “Crowder.” The music remains true to that of the official recordings, the live element contributing just the slightest “raw” feel. From the electronic beats, to Crowder’s signature vocals, it’s all here.

The set is comprised of sixteen songs from their latest two ventures with the exception of “O Praise Him.” As far as performance goes, there is no disappointment, and as far as something “different” the crowd adds a great element of corporate worship, shining bright on the beautifully intense “You Are My Joy” and the hopeful “Never Let Go.” It’s also fun to hear Crowder interact with the audience, adding a slight personal vibe to the disc. These live elements are welcomed additions, especially for those who have played the songs to the point that they comprise sixteen of their iTunes top 25 playlist.

The Remedy Club Tour will make a great addition to any worship enthusiasts library, and is bound to sell. Is it a must have? Not necessarily. However if you’re an ardent Crowder fan, be sure to pick it up.

Rating: 3.5 out of 5
Street Date: August 19th 2008

Track Listing:

1.) I’m Just Trying to Make You Sing
2.) The Glory of It All
3.) Can You Feel It?
4.) Everything Glorious
5.) …Neverending…
6.) Here Is Our King
7.) You Are My Joy
8.) We Won’t Be Quiet
9.) Foreveranever… Ect…
10.) A Beautiful Collision
11.) Never Let Go
12.) Remedy
13.) I Saw The Light
14.) No One Like You
15.) O Praise Him
16.) Surely We Can Change

Beautiful Savior,

May our hearts be fertile ground for You to plant seeds of wisdom, genuine compassion, faith, discernment, love, humility, trust, patience, peace and understanding.

May our hearts be overgrown with the fruit of Your Spirit.

Bring revival in our hearts and over this parched land, a land where there is famine- “not famine of food or a thirst for water,
but a famine of hearing the words of the LORD.” (Amos 8:11b)

Come, Holy Spirit, Come. We need You.

Written in the journal from the Prayer Room during 40.

Its true that the Lord will carry our burdens for us and cleanse us of our mistakes.

But sometimes I feel that I have to stop and reflect on them so that I can truly understand. In that way, I can come to grips with my mistakes and understand the damage they have caused. When I stop to reflect on my sin it brings me to my knees. It is with that weight finally bearing down that I will then call upon the name of the Lord to take away the pain. I feel like most of the time I have no idea what I am doing and just try to keep up with the Lord the best I can.

Carry me, Lord, for my troubles are overwhelming. I need you- Your grace is the water that washes me clean. I can talk to you, Lord, and you hear me. I can be me to you and you love me all the more. Praise you with trumpets and drums, with strings and songs. O Lord, I know your near; I know you hear my cries. You found me in my weakness and yet lifted me up into your clouds. You gave me sight and blessed me. You told me “Go and do my will. Love and forget. Dance for me and sing of you salvation.” Praise you, Lord, until my last dying breath when you will be calling me home to spend the rest of eternity with You. Thank you, Lord, for loving me and letting me to love you.

Thank you for Calling!