Shelly breeds color. From her different color tunics to her bright eyes, her aura is teeming with life, a life that is robust and purposeful despite the fact that she drifts from address to address each day.

I met Shelly a couple months ago during the latter part of the summer. She sat with her back straight against the fence, both hands resting gently on her lap, her body turned to the woman next to her. The soft lines of Shelly’s torso curved in as she bent over in the chair, laughing. And when she smiled, she showed her teeth – a neat line of champagne-colored headlights.

As I approached the two of them, conversation stopped. Shelly’s companion shifted in her chair before getting up and slowly walking away, her head down. But rather than rise from her seat, she lifted up her hand and invited me forward, motioning to her friend’s vacated seat.

Shelly and I connected within the first five minutes of our conversation. Words built upon sentences, which added up into paragraphs, which gave birth to dreams and history and story – the material, the textile of a human heart. Talking to Shelly that day, I learned about her family. Her passion for cooking and writing and photography. Every word she spoke pointed to the fact that she was independent and driven.

It’s hard for me to write this because Shelly isn’t just another drifting face I met on the street. I prayed that God would lead me to a woman to walk alongside with, to encourage and love and learn from. He gave me Shelly. Over the last few months she’s become a genuine friend. We’ve shared recipes and writing projects. Drank coffee together. She’s shared her excitement with me, but has also told me about times she’s been in danger, times that she’s been hurt.

With Shelly, it all feels too real.

Shelly is an answer to a prayer. Please be an answer to some of hers this week as you think about her:
1. Pray that Shelly might be a light in a dark place. That her faith in Christ might continue to grow and that she continues to tell other people about the Joy that is otherworldly.
2. Pray for her safety. She’s staying at a notoriously dangerous place right now and has been attacked several times.
3. Pray for reconciliation in her family, guidance and direction as to what her next steps need to be.

Do we realize how comfortable we are?

How comfortable are you? This is a serious question, as it has serious implications that connect to the reality of Christ and the cross. There is a serious examination that we need to go through.

Most of us have grown up in a society without need. We’ve always had a roof over our heads, clean water, good friends and family around us. We’ve gone through schools, we are educated, we are taken care of, we have few real worries. Are we blessed?

We can praise God every day for the things we have, and we do, but what if they were taken from us? Where does your comfort end and your faith begin? Is there a gap that needs to be closed?

Lets say you got into a car accident. That would be a bad day. It’s probably going to cost you some money to repair the car, possibly some for medical bills. Then, you’re also not going to have a car for a bit; it may be hard to get around. What if your pet died? You’ve had it most of your life; it’s practically a part of the family. Can your faith survive these misfortunes? Really, these are pathetic examples. If your faith can’t survive these situations, then there may be other issues at play in your life.

The situations I’m speaking to are much more serious. I’m talking about the situations you can’t stand in. The ones that make you drop to the ground, sobbing uncontrollably. The ones that make you seriously question, “Why God, why?!” The situations so life shattering that they rip you to the very core of your being and bring your world to a screeching halt. I don’t even have to list examples because I’m sure you’re already listing them in your head.

Is your comfort such that you believe deep down these events would never take place? If they did, where would your faith in Christ stand?

Please don’t misunderstand me: I’m not minimizing these situations. They should cause you all the pain in the world. But at the end of your grieving, would you be able to stand and say “God is in control”? Would you understand and proclaim that whatever God has planned is for the forwarding of His kingdom?

There were so many times in the Bible where God took something away from a person or group of people because they were putting it before Him, and many times where Jesus would hit people hard about the things they were keeping back from God, but the obvious example to use is really Job. Put yourself in Job’s place. You have a great home, health, everything you need, a fantastic family. Life is good. Then God takes it ALL away. If, after serious consideration, any of these events would cause you to curse the name of God and turn your back to Him, I urge you to re-examine where your faith stands and what the Cross of Christ really means to you.

Immediately after being informed of all the tragedies that had befallen him, this is what Job said:

“Naked I came from my mother’s womb,
and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away;
may the name of the LORD be praised.” - Job 1:21

Honestly I struggle with the idea of losing some things in my life. But when the reality of Christ hits me, and the cause of His Kingdom, it eclipses all other things. I encourage you to take comfort in the cross and the cross alone in this world, as it is the only thing assured, by the blood of a holy God who loves us unconditionally and eternally. It is the only link to salvation from all the tragedies of this life and the only access to an eternal life with God.

The first time I really grasped the concept of eternity, I was knocked off my feet. For years and years as a Christian I had this preconceived notion: even though I was saved through Jesus Christ, eternity wasn’t now. Eternity came after death, and I was just waiting…doing nothing in the meantime.

Then my eyes were opened to a new perspective on eternity. If Jesus died for me, and I am saved, then eternity is now! Eternal life and hope with Christ began the moment I believed what was done on the cross. This new perspective of eternity for me put a new twist on my life on earth. Jesus died for me, so I should live for him now instead of in the life that is to come.

I implemented this idea into as many areas of my life as I could think of. Shouldn’t we put into practice while we’re on earth what the Kingdom of heaven/new earth is going to be like? This type of living is in Bible (personally I think of Ephesians 4:1, which states “I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received”). If someday there will come an end to poverty, then shouldn’t I be going down to places like Detroit and doing what I can to combat poverty in this world? If someday there will be no suffering or weeping, shouldn’t I be doing what I can to comfort others and prevent tragedy? If someday our bodies are going to be perfect when God makes everything new, shouldn’t I be taking care of mine and striving for the best health possible so that I can advance the Gospel as long as I possibly can? This list goes on forever. You can apply this “eternal” perspective to anything in your life.

It recently occurred to me that this idea that is in the Bible…how often do we apply it to unity within the Church? As a member of the Church I can ashamedly say that this is something I have never thought about until now. Ephesians 4:3 says to “Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace,” but have we really ever thought about why?

If you were to close your eyes (which in this case you cannot do because you are reading my blog…unless you have translucent eyelids) I’d want you to think of a fellow Christian. This fellow Christian that is coming to your mind is not one who is a close friend or mentor. Actually, it is quite the opposite. Its someone that you may secretly look down upon. Its someone that for one reason or another, you have a very awkward relationship with, whether it is because of a broken/former dating relationship or someone you heard has some issues with you that were never sorted out. There are so many more examples I can give, but there is one thing in common- you are definitely not on good terms with them.

Now, considering that fellow Christian you are not on good terms with - has it ever occurred to you that you will be spending the rest of your life (even if you don’t see them much now) with that person in ETERNITY? Its funny how we avoid certain people because things are weird between us, all the while knowing that we can’t avoid him or her forever. We may succeed in this temporary life, but is that going to be possible after we die and we’re with Jesus? I think we all know the answer to that. Also, when God’s work on earth is said and done, there will be no more broken relationships or dis-fellowship. Earthly disputes will someday no longer matter to us, and we’ll see each other with unstained eyes like Jesus always has. Doesn’t this make you think- why not mend things NOW? Why wait until it is an absolute?

This is extremely beneficial to you, the other person, and the Church! When we actively go out and try to mend these broken friendships, we are only making the Church more unified in heart and mind; once this friendship is put back together, you have a friend back (and you can add them back on Facebook since he or she removed you after that one argument you two got into). Just because you try to fix these shattered relationships doesn’t mean things will always go well. The desire for them to be mended has to be mutual and everyone has to have a humble attitude, patience, and the ability to speak the truth in love.

All I’m saying is…why do we never let go of arguments? Why do we let bitterness fill our hearts instead of love and mercy? It’s the worst when it’s with our fellow believers because we should be united as one! Next time we have an issue with a believer, we should realize how petty it is in perspective of needing be a member of Christ’s body and how these people are our ETERNAL brothers and sisters. They aren’t going anywhere. As for those relationships that have already been damaged, let’s seek opportunities to heal them and pray about God breaking not only that other person’s heart but ours as well. Sometimes we don’t want to put these relationships back together and we harden our hearts and minds towards the idea of that. Let’s not forget though that God said NOTHING is impossible with Him (Luke 3:16).

A church that is not unified cannot stand. My prayer is that we would work to build each other up in love, because that is what holds us all together in Christ. Seek to put together broken relationships with other Christians and seek to never let a broken relationship with another Christian happen again. We can do all things through Christ who strengthens all the believers (Phil 4:13).

Ephesians 4:16: From Him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work. Amen.

“Why God? Why I am here?”

I posed these questions while I lived in California. I truly was struggling out there - I had just lost a Grandparent and had another failing Grandparent. All my friends were in Michigan, and I had left a church that had brought me back from being away from the Lord. All I could manage to do was ask those questions.

One night I had just sat and enjoyed a worship service, and I was heading back to my apartment. It would take me roughly 20 to 30 minutes to get from church to back home. I decided to get off the highway. At the time I was broken and again posed the questions above. “I just don’t get it, Lord. What is my purpose? I love you, but why I am 2,000 miles away from family?” I kept on driving. Even as I drove, I was brought to tears being so far away from family and friends. I felt such distance from everyone. If you know anything about California, there are a lot of people there but also such loneliness. As, I drove and drove I started to climb this little hill or mountain and it even went to one lane. The entire time I was in tears, just totally broken from distance. I felt as if I was small and I didn’t matter. Then, I came to this point of just pure beauty. It literally took my breath away. This picture is just piece of what I saw. I had literally just asked God ‘Why am I here?” The gaze after that breath was this beautiful sight.

To most this is a picture of hills and water, but to me it is so much more. At this time, we were being told that we didnt have enough water and that wild fires were raging the bay area. I couldn’t believe the beauty of this reservoir. The people that drove by must have wondered what I was looking at. I was looking at what God had for me. “Brian, it’s not about why you are here. It is about ME!. Look how beautiful my creations are; look at who I AM. Brian, I AM everywhere. I AM with you wherever you go. Don’t ask why you’re here but what you can be or do.”

Eventually I ended coming back home, but I will never forget the day that God showed a broken man just how beautiful and amazing He is and how grateful I am to be His creation.

GENRE: COMEDY
RATING: PG-13
STUDIO: 20TH CENTURY FOX
THEATRICAL RELEASE: JULY 10, 2009
DVD RELEASE: NOVEMBER 3, 2009

I gotta say…I feel stupider for having watched this film. It was an hour and a half of mindless drivel that I never once laughed at. So, as a comedy, it fails. Even as mind-numbing entertainment it fails. I’d rather watch Transformers 2 over and over and over again than ever have to watch I Love You Beth Cooper ever again.

From the pointless plot (if you can call it that), to the terrible acting, to the no-laugh comedic antics, this movie falls on its face from the get-go. The previews showed all of the parts that had any potential of being funny at all. Unfortunately, those parts never panned out.

Truth be told, the only reason I even bothered picking up this mindless drivel was because I like Hayden Panetierre. Needless to say, I’m sorry I did and I can’t believe she even did this movie. Did she even read the script? Was there even a script to read?

Sometimes I love to hate a movie. If that movie has been overhyped, yet tells the same old story we’ve been told before, yeah, I enjoy taking it down a notch. However, I don’t love hating I Love You Beth Cooper. I just hate Beth Cooper. Maybe if I were a Neanderthal high school student playing World of Warcraft in my parents’ basement with Cheetos covered fingers I might find some of this movie amazing. But, even a Neanderthal high school student playing World of Warcraft in their parents’ basement might be a little too sophisticated for this movie.

And don’t even get me started on the poor attempt to add a “message” to this film. Really? Really? Are you seriously going to try to preach a message of “acceptance” and “transparency” in a movie like this one? Really? How dare you.

I’ve done you all a favor by watching this movie. Now I can tell you not to watch it.

Don’t watch it. It’s stupid. You’ll be stupider for watching it.

Review copy provided courtesy of 20th Century Fox.

Review used by permission from The Christian Manifesto.

A friend asked me recently, “What is your greatest fear?” That’s a tough answer. Do I fear fear? This is a topic that is dear to my heart. Fear can lead to anxiety and restlessness. Am I doing God’s will? In the past have I questioned that numerous times. I am doing my best to not to constantly question that. It takes away from the story we can or could create in our lives.

I have never been a big reader till this year. I guess I’ve never slowed down enough to enjoy a good book. The book A Million Miles in a Thousand Years speaks of living a great story or striving to be better. I will not tell you more than that as I recommend that you read it. But, it’s really provoked a lot of thought. I believe that if we stop fearing what we should do and acting on it instead, we truly will find out how we can use and find our gifts to glorify our God. I had a conversation with Pastor Cliff one day and came to the realization that at times my fear had taken grips over me and had taken me away from his glory. I wasn’t hitting my potential.

I am a sports guy, so I like this analogy. I am helping coach at Upward Basketball, and I am amazed at all the children. I have children on my team that are All Stars, and I have children that are not as athletic in the least. I am glad we have that on our team. Being a good athlete, I would slack off at times or not give my best on a daily basis because I didn’t have to. I see kids that don’t have the best talent, but they work hard and may ask coach how do they get better. How amazing is that? I may be teaching them things, but these kids are teaching me more than they know. The smiles on thier faces could make a grump smile. They may not be the best, but they are giving their all, and I can see their hearts.

The passage that comes to mind is Mark 12:41-44 (The Widow’s Offering). It talks about a woman who gave less than a penny, but because it was all she had, it was more than the others who were giving large monetary amounts. I believe we can relate this to our story, gifts and talents. You may not have money, but you have time to do something. It’s not about how much you give or how much you do but how much heart you bring. I was that person who would get home from work and just be complacent with having a schedule and afraid to branch out and do more. I speaking to people like myself that find a excuse to not do because they feel that they don’t have anything better to do. It is amazing how our fear can take control and make great excuses for not living a better story.

Fear remains a big part of this. We fear because we don’t know. What job should we take? Should I move? Should I get involved in this or that group? Do I go into ministry? These are all questions that have come up in my head in the past months, but what if I just jumped and did something? Would I get hurt? Maybe or maybe I have an amazing experience, one that led to making a connection, which led to an amazing situation. How can we look at that as anything besides a “God thing”? That is my pledge to myself. I have touched this a little and it has brought me so much joy. I encourage you to do the same. Don’t be afraid to do something. It could lead you somewhere that you never thought you would be.

Remove the fear. God is so much bigger than us. Let’s not put him in a box. I say this to myself as much as I say to you. Go live a story! I leave you with this verse of truth. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

In his letter to the Ephesians, the apostle Paul brings his final charge to put on the full armor of God. He concludes with an emphasis on prayer: “And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints” (Eph 6:18). He begins the next verse by making his own request, “Pray also for me…”. Paul, the apostle of Jesus Christ, the “greatest missionary”, the author of 13 letters of the inspired Word of God, makes a personal prayer request for himself:
“Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.” (Ephesians 6:19-20).

You can tell a lot about a person’s heart and focus in their prayer requests. Of all the things Paul could be concerned about and want prayer for, he asks this: That every time he opens his mouth, he’d be given words to boldly proclaim the Gospel. Paul just got done urging the believers to continually be in prayer and he asks of them a continual request, for every time he opens his mouth. And he prays for boldness and fearlessness in doing so. Paul knew where our boldness of speech comes from. He says in 2 Corinthians 3:12, “Therefore having such a hope, we use great boldness in our speech” (NASB). We’re bold, because we have hope; and as Paul tells Timothy, Christ Jesus is “our Hope” (1 Tim 1:1).

We also see a glimpse of his intentions in this request, which could not be more selfless. He demonstrates humility in even asking for prayer, showing his need and weakness apart from prayer and God. The Gospel is his main concern, and sharing it with others was his passion and desire. There is no focus on himself in this request, only an interest in spreading the Gospel. Paul had no greater ambition in life here, and it is clear to see through his request. In other letters he wrote, Paul makes very similar requests which further show his heart’s main passion. “Pray for us that the word of the Lord will spread rapidly and be glorified, just as it did also with you” (2 Thessalonians 3:1). “Praying at the same time for us as well, that God will open up to us a door for the word, so that we may speak forth the mystery of Christ, for which I have also been imprisoned” (Colossians 4:3).

Remember also, Paul is writing this letter from jail, while in chains; however, there is no mention to pray for his pain or circumstances. He’s far more concerned for the spread of the good news of Christ. Remember, this is the man who reminded us that God works all things together for our good, and he believed it (Romans 8:28). He believed that God knew what was best for Him, and these trials and sufferings he went through must be ultimately good in his Father’s eyes. So he endured them, even found joy in them, knowing that the cause of Christ far outweighed his earthly desires.

Paul understood this and wanted us to see it too. “Now I want you to know, brothers, that what has happened to me has really served to advance the gospel. As a result, it has become clear throughout the whole palace guard and to everyone else that I am in chains for Christ. Because of my chains, most of the brothers in the Lord have been encouraged to speak the word of God more courageously and fearlessly” (Philippians 1:12-14). His prayer request from his letter to the Ephesians was being answered! Paul delighted in the Lord and His Truth more than himself, and God gave him the righteous desires of his heart (Psalm 37:4). As he saw God using his momentary troubles greatly for His kingdom and saw his story giving boldness to others to do the same, he wanted to share it with the Philippians to set them ablaze with boldness for the Gospel’s sake too.

Paul’s obsession with the Gospel is so convicting to me. The way he minimizes his own trials and struggles in order to maximize the cause of Christ is more than admiral. I’d have to think that if I were being beaten in prison, my main prayer request/concern would deal with that present trouble. But Paul does not make much mention of it. I want to be far more concerned about proclaiming the Gospel than anything else. I want to know that the best thing that could happen to me is that I would make a difference for my Savior. I want to know what it’s like to desire boldness over a place to rest my head. And I want to understand that when I pray that God would use me to do the greatest good, that it could include being beaten, flogged, whipped, stoned, shipwrecked, endangered, hungry, thirsty, cold, naked, or unbearably weak, yet if Christ be glorified, that would indeed be the greatest good (2 Cor 11:23-29).

“He must increase, but I must decrease.” (John 3:30 )

That little voice inside your head. Making suggestions, claims, or simply giving advice. Do you listen to it? Avoid it? Love it? Hate it? Is it helpful? Hurtful? Do you even hear it at all anymore?

Our conscious is about as ever-changing as we are, and it is just about as perfect as we are too. But when you decide to live your life for Christ that little voice starts to change. A heavy influence is gained by The Holy Spirit. He starts to whisper His truths to us through our own thoughts. It’s really a gift the world cannot even begin to understand. Unfortunately the sin within us still likes to fight for control of this tiny voice in our heads.

In Romans 2, Paul is speaking to the Jews about being circumcised. He explains to them that simply a physical circumcision is pointless unless you obey the law, and even someone who is not circumcised yet obeys the law condemns those who are yet don’t obey the law. He really lays out the point in the last verse, “No, a man is a Jew if he is one inwardly; and circumcision is circumcision of the heart, by the Spirit, not by the written code. Such a man’s praise is not from men, but from God.“

The change that happens inside of us is by the Spirit, it’s what comes out of our heart that is important, not the facade we put on to make us look good. So what does this have to do with our conscious?

Well, our conscious comes straight from our hearts. It is our raw, unfiltered, immediate reaction to our thought life and the world around us. But our hearts have been circumcised for Christ now so we need to make sure the conscious we are listening to is the one controlled by the Spirit and not our selfish sin. If you read my last blog I talked about trying with all our might to do things on our own. It’s pretty apparent that with our sinfulness we can’t take control of our hearts on our own; we need The Spirit, and there is only one way to make sure The Spirit is what surfaces as our conscious and not our sin. That is constant meditation on God’s word. Psalms 119:15 says “I meditate on your precepts and consider your ways”, and 119:97 says “Oh, how I love your law! I meditate on it all day long.” Verse 99 says “I have more insight than all my teachers, for I meditate on your statutes.”

I’ve noticed in my own life that there is a direct correlation between how much time I spend in The Word, and how often my conscious is more likely to say things like “Is that Christ-like? You should read your bible. You shouldn’t give into this temptation.” The less time I spend in The Word, the more often I give in to things like, “There’s nothing wrong with that,” or, “What’s one more screw up?”

If you are serious about the circumcision that has taken place in your heart, I recommend spending some serious time in your Bible, often. The words of the Spirit will be so much clearer and louder in your conscious that they will drown out that other guy who just wants to harm you.

The dock feels empty now.
Lone cross in the distance.
Somehow, the swan’s song is not as beautiful as it once was.
Trails thin as winter sets in.
My coat pulled tight ‘round, visiting the fallen oak.
Cold air biting at earlobes and chapping lips.
Eyes burn, vision and judgment blurring.
Such hope.
Such.
Sweet.
Passionate.
Hope.
Appetite for love now pained knots.
Flittering butterflies now unmoving stones.
Lengthy epistles now few words.
Stolen moments now history lessons.
Knowing glances now avoided contact.
Warm smiles now awkward.
Lingering embraces now a gulf between.
Sunlight seems dimmer somehow.
I.
Cannot.
Breathe.
Without.
You.
Are.
My.
Heart.

I write this as a person who knows this, yet still struggles with it. We all want to be accepted. We all want to be liked in some shape or form. As we grow as people, we make mistakes and use others to possibly move ourselves forward at another’s expense. I too have done this. I have been sarcastic and can come off as sometimes mean. But, I am trying to look at people in a new light. Not as a hater, but as a friend. Not as an acquaintance, but as that friend you have know since you were little child.

When children get comfortable with you, it can be so amazing. So pure and righteous. A lot of kids don’t hold grudges. They may have a fit but once it’s over they forget about it. They bring joy to a room and it brings others joy. Being happy can be contagious, just as being sad can be contagious. Sometimes I am broken by messages and stories, but can feel that there is joy amidst all this brokenness.

Life can be discouraging, but we have joy in Jesus Christ, our Savior. He has conquered all of this. We know how it ends yet we all worry about other things, which in the end, won’t matter. We are so blessed to have place to worship. Bibles to read. Friends to talk to. Pastors to learn from. Places to impact.

We worry about hating people versus moving forward and loving someone.

How about we love that person never met. They may need it. Then they might show love to us and so forth. Now we have a movement. That movement could lead to something on Monday or Tuesday. It’s so simple. “Can I pray for you? How are you?” These questions show you care.

Branch out; meet new people. We can impact people around us. We are a light. Let’s be more of a lighthouse. Think about how many young adults come to see us every week. The lost looking for a safe harbor. Let’s not let people just slide in and slide out. We can love our neighbor as ourselves. Let’s do it.

WE CAN BE A LIGHTHOUSE FOR THE LOST AND BROKEN.
WE CAN BRING JOY IN THE MIDST OF SORROW.
WE ARE A LIGHTHOUSE.