My ankles are really puffy and weird looking right now, unless it’s normal to have them be larger than your thighs. They have always been pretty swollen in general from a lifetime of sports abuse and unfortunate genes but right now they are truly troubled. I sat next to a chiropractor on my flight back to Detroit from Chicago and after she recovered from gasping at my Klumps-sized ankles, she told me that my body was healing from the trauma that I put my poor lower extremities through. She bluntly asked me if I exercise regularly when I’m not scaling the peaks of Turkey barehanded, and I sheepishly smirked and shrugged. For some reason she didn’t seem surprised. She advised me to start. By my calculations, hiking 120 miles in Turkey has bought me about 7 years of down time to return to my standard yearly rate of activity.

My hands are very tan. As are my forearms, forehead, and foreneck. Ok - not the foreneck, the backneck. Also, I noticed that the back of my calves are really tan, but then they turn pale right just before the knee, apparently the point at which my drooping shorts reached. I think that part of the reason that I didn’t feel claustrophobic in the tiny cramped stone silent tunnels that Frodo would have struggled to fit through was because I have a larger phobia of having my shorts drop down below a certain acceptable level on my lower back. I was pretty focused on keeping the lunar sightings to a minimum.

I keep doing weird things in my sleep. Last night I was looking for something in the sheets, in fact the search led me to stand up at the foot of the bed. Thankfully, I realized that I was sound asleep and that what I was looking for was just my pillow and the Holy Grail.

Two nights ago I was following the group into a very dark tunnel that had to be crawled through, and as I did my best to keep up with the group, I became very annoyed that someone had attached a very bright green alarm clock to the back of their pack. I didn’t need to know that it was 3:37am as we followed the rabbi into the caves of Cappadoccia. Oh - woops. I’m asleep again. Sorry babe.

I was so tired that I caught myself sleeping during one of the teachings. I woke up and quickly starting writing down what I was hearing. I realized that I had taken off my backpack. I then realized that I had taken off my shirt too. And my shorts. And I’m in my bed. Shoot. I really need some sleep - this is getting embarassing.

I have caught myself several time reaching for my left shoulder to take a quick sip of water through my Camelback hydration system. I have a weird wet spot on the shoulder of my shirt as I realize quietly that it is cotton, not a nozzle. I’ve been pretty thirsty I guess, going from drinking 400 ounces of water a day back to my customary 6.

They should make pills for this…